Like Sea Monkeys in your pants

“I’m hoping you could give me some advice. My boyfriend is all excited about the love lice, pubic hair animal things and wants us to get them. I’m not sure this is such a good idea. He says these are specially bred and they’re not the same kind as homeless people’s lice. He says these are bigger and tame. I’d never heard of this before, but he and his buddies are all into it. “

The LoveBugz.net has specially bred giant Japanese crab lice that don’t bite, claims they make great pets.

I thought the site was just a creative ad-farm scheme, so said “Sure! Send ‘em to me!” Because, seriously. It had to be a a scam. Who is going to go to the Better Business Bureau and complain that they didn’t get the pubic lice they paid for?